davies says ii

"I think the world of you, Maria. So let's stop this foolishness and talk to the point. Will you marry me?"
"Why should I marry you?"
"That would take a long time to answer, but I'll give you the best reason: because I think we have become very good friends, and could go on to be splendid friends, and would be very likely to be wonderful friends forever."
"Friends?"
"What's wrong with being friends?"
"When people talk about marriage, they generally use stronger words than that."
"Do they? I don't know. I've never asked anyone to marry me before."
"You mean you've never been in love?"
"Certainly I've been in love. More times than I can count. I've had two or three affairs with girls I loved. But I knew very well that they weren't friends."
"You put friendship above love?"
"Doesn't everybody? No, that's a foolish question; of course they don't. They talk about love to people with whom they are infatuated, and sometimes involved to the point of devotion. I've nothing against love. Most enjoyable. But I'm talking to you about marriage."
"Marriage. But you don't love me?"
"Of course I love you, fathead, but I'm serious about marriage, and marriage with anyone whom I do not think the most splendid friend I've ever had doesn't interest me. Love and sex are very fine but they won't last. Friendship--the kind of friendship I am talking about--is charity and loving-kindness more than it's sex and it lasts as long as life. What's more, it grows, and sex dwindles: has to. So--will you marry me and be friends? We'll have love and we'll have sex, but we won't build on those alone. You don't have to answer now. But I wish you'd think very seriously about it, because if you say no--"
"You'll go to Africa and shoot lions."
"No; I'll think you've made a terrible mistake."
"You think well of yourself, don't you?"
"Yes, and I think well of you--better of you than of anybody. These are liberated days, Maria; I don't have to crawl and whine and pretend I can't live without you. I can, and if I must, I'll do it. But I can live so much better with you, and you can live so much better with me, that it's stupid to play games about it."
--Robertson Davies, The Rebel Angels