serenity now

Saw The Science of Sleep tonight. It didn't strike me quite as deeply as Eternal Sunshine, but I still found it moving, and I feel like I'd need to see it again to understand more of what was going on.

Today was another meaningful day for me. I've realized that I can saturate my days with meaning simply by spending time on activities that I find meaningful. Go figure. Today, after the world religions lecture and TA meeting (which was meaningful because we were discussing teaching issues), I met a friend for lunch, which was wonderful. I hadn't seen this person in a while, we had a great conversation, and I felt inspired and supported afterwards--I really have met some amazing people here, and while I sometimes wish that I had more of a "group," the one-on-one connections I've made with certain people run as deep as I could hope.

After lunch, I spent the afternoon at ER (as I mentioned in my earlier post)--I got quite a bit done, and decided I need to try to apply for this one dissertation fellowship, even though it's going to be a lot of work, and a long shot, since I'm not quite at the dissertation proposal stage. But I feel like I need to try, and I'm thinking it will motivate me to work a little harder this next month--it'll be a concrete goal that will require me to complete a lot of the other things that have been hanging over my head the past few weeks, months. Even if I don't get the thing, I'll still feel accomplished. And imagine if I do! I'd be set next year!

After ER, I worked out, ate dinner, saw the movie, went to Kopi with the moviegoers, supposedly to work but as it turned out we mostly talked, and then home.

I felt content today--really content. Not overly happy, not overjoyed, but content. Like I know I'm doing the right thing for myself, like I've figured something out. It's a sort of serenity. I can handle what's coming, even if things get busy.